Part 2: Transitions – The Red Stranger Circle Transitions to Orange Wave Circle Disc 3, Story 2

“Kids on the Block”

Synopsis of the Story

In this story Faith sees two neighborhood children, Alex and Corey, from her apartment building. These boys are playing Frisbee in the courtyard of the apartment complex. She recognizes them, makes eye contact, says hello and answers a brief question in a polite way. Scott makes a mistake and tries to en- gage the children in a teaching activity, without realizing that he is making a mistake by overstepping the boundary limit with children. Faith realizes that Scott needs to review his circle for children.

Making Your Point

Faith speaks with the children only long enough to be polite and avoid hurting their feelings. Then moves on. She does not touch them or ask them to extend trust to her. She has heard them refer to each other by name and so she knows their names, but does not know them well. She is aware that they are too young to be her friends. Faith understands that it is up to the children’s parents to instruct them when it is necessary, appropriate or desirable for a relationship to change.

Scott has made an error in judgment regarding these children when he tries to teach them about the Frisbee game. He oversteps the boundary limits of talk and trust, but his intentions are not abusive. He was not introduced to them by their parents. It is particularly important that Scott review his Orange Wave Circle, because he does not want his actions to be misunderstood and his intentions misconstrued. Adults do not socialize with unfamiliar children without guardian approval or supervision.

Even though Faith decided to briefly and temporarily cross the boundary of talk with these children, she was merely responding to their initiation politely. She still had only limited talk with them and recognized that it did not change her Orange Wave Circle relationship with them.

Key Objectives

To show an example of a mutual change in a relationship, from the Red Stranger Circle to the Orange Wave Circle with children whose faces are familiar
To illustrate that when one person is interested in moving closer in a relationship that an indirect and subtle signal is given by asking to cross the expected boundaries of touch, talk, or requesting
To show that sometimes a relationship boundary can be crossed by mistake, but that act does not change the relationship circle or necessarily constitute
To introduce the concept of parental/guardian permission in establishing or changing relationship circles when children are

Sequential Process

Step 1:

Teacher will begin by reviewing the past session: replaying the video from the previous meeting, stressing the most important points and eliciting answers and comment from participants.

Step 2:

Inform participants that today they will learn about how relationships can change when children are concerned.

Step 3:

Show Part 2, Disc 3, Story 2: “Kids on the Block” pausing when the story is concluded.

Step 4:

Elicit the following information from the participants, replaying the video if desired or needed:

Two boys from Faith’s apartment building greet her with a hello and ask her a
Faith responds to the greeting from the children with eye contact, a wave and a brief, polite answer to the question that they asked
Faith continues on her way because she knows that these children are in her Orange Wave
Faith knows that it is up to their parents to decide if a closer relationship with Faith is appropriate, necessary or
Scott stops and engages the He tries to teach them how to play Frisbee. He mistakenly crosses boundaries without the children’s parents’ knowledge or approval.
Scott’s actions could be misunderstood and he is inadvertently encouraging children to trust adults that they or their parents do not know
Faith knows that this is a mistake that Scott should learn to She vows to help him learn about the boundary limits with children.

Step 5:

Help participants to review or define these vocabulary words and generate a discussion about how the words are used in the story that they have just seen:

Children
Adults
Familiar
Initiate
Mistake
Misunderstood
Parental approval

Step 6:

Elicit from students the touch, talk, and trust signals that indicate that one person wants to change the relationship:

Touch: No touch transition signals are given by Faith or Scott that they are trying to change their relationship circle with the children.

Talk: The talk signal that the children give to Faith that suggested that they wanted to move from the Red Stranger Circle to the Orange Wave Circle was communicated by asking Faith a question. Faith communicated her agreement to the relationship change by answering briefly and politely.

Trust: The children gave no signals to Scott that they wanted to move from the Red Strang- er Circle to the Orange Wave Circle. Scott overstepped the expected boundary limits by mistake. The relationship did not change even though Scott asked for the children’s trust.

Step 7:

Invite participants to select icons to place on the wall graph and demonstrate the kind of touch, talk, and trust that did or did not indicate a signal that the relationship might change.

Step 8:

Invite participants to use pictorial icons and arrow icons to show the starting circle relationships and ending circle relationships of Faith and Scott with the children.

Step 9:

Instruct participants to open their CIRCLES Journal to the story titled “The Kids on the Block”. Allow time for participants to complete their journaling story for this lesson.

Step 10:

Hand out the reproducible worksheet at the end of this lesson for participants to complete in class or for homework.

Journal Entry - “Kids on the Block”

Write your own story about a child from your neighborhood that you got to recognize and with whom you were polite. Include the following information in your story: