The COLD (Passive) Response to Self-Anger
Passive or "COLD" responses usually involve withdrawal or avoidance Passive responses include:
Looking COLD
"Victim-like" demeanor involves:
- Head down, no eye contact with others.
- Body bent over.
- Sad or blank facial expression.
- Timid body movements.
Thinking COLD
"Self-blaming Perceiving Style" with statements like:
- It's my fault. I'm not a good person. I can't do anything right."
- "I’m just an idiot for feeling this way."
- “There's nothing I can do about it.”
- "If I speak up, it won't do any good."
Acting COLD
Behavior that gives up, turns away, withdraws or becomes depressed, such as:
- Do or Say nothing
- Mutter Or speak with low voice volume.
- Cry
- Meck, "I did something wrong," victim voice.
- Avoid the person.
Drawbacks of the COLD (Passive) Response
Drawbacks of cold responses to self-anger include misdirected anger, failure to resolve interpersonal conflicts, negative thoughts about self, and feelings of anger, frustration or sadness.
Return to: Self Anger: Definition and Introduction
Go to: Self Anger: The HOT Response