Concept
Touches can change from "okay" to "not okay" leaving children feeling confused and upset.
Objectives
Children will be able to:
- Understand that touch can change from "okay" to "not okay touch."
- Recognize a change of feeling in themselves from happiness to confusion.
- Demonstrate understanding that some touching can make you feel confused and mixed up inside and produce an "uh-oh" feeling.
Teacher Information
Pictures #36-38 illustrate the concept of "confusing touch." Inappropriate sexual touch can result in the same type of confused and upset feelings as those produced by more innocent physical play. Pictures #36-38 can serve as a bridge to help children understand that touches can change from wanted to unwanted situations. These pictures also will help children relate to the resulting feelings of unwanted touch-the feeling that "Uh-oh! Something is wrong." If children can identify this confused feeling in concrete, familiar situations, they may be able to make the analogy to unfamiliar sexual experiences. There can be a range of feelings that change as a situation progresses. The flaps on these pictures allow you to present the illustrations one at a time, in sequence, in order to help the children understand this continuum of changing emotions.
Once again, however, this curriculum cannot be taught using pictures alone. We urge the use of additional activities appropriate to the age and language level of your class. When you teach this concept, it will be particularly helpful to demonstrate these situations using dolls. Once you have the children understand the situation, it will be helpful to let the children themselves set the limits. For example, as the teacher throws the doll into the air, the children should be encouraged to say "STOP!" when they feel the situation has gone too far. This will help the children to internalize a feeling of control. Be sure to reinforce the "tell" portion of the NO-GO-TELL! safety rule: Even if a child says "NO!" or "STOP!" to confusing or abusive behavior, there is no guarantee they will be safe. Children cannot protect themselves alone. Telling means they can be helped.
Picture Description and Suggested Language Guidelines
- Here are two little boys. They are playing. They are wrestling. They are having fun. (Lift flap.)
- Now the boys are playing too hard-someone might get hurt. One boy wants to stop playing. (Lift flap.)
- Look! The little boy is crying. He is very upset. He is not having fun at all. (Lift flap.)
- The boy feels upset and confused. "Uh-oh! Something is wrong." The touch began as an "okay touch" but it changed into a "not okay touch." What should the little boy do?
Activities
- Use dolls to demonstrate this scene. Allow the students to say when to stop.
- Roleplay situations of play scenes that progress beyond the point of fun.
- Make a book using classroom experiences that may have started out as fun but may have gone too far, such as wrestling, tickling, etc.