Anger: The COLD Response

The COLD (Passive) Response to Another's Anger

Passive or "COLD" responses to another's anger usually involve withdrawal or avoidance. Passive responses include:

COLD Appearance:

1. Head down, No eye contact with angry person.
2. Body bent over.
3. Sad or blank facial expression.
4. Timid body movements

COLD Thoughts or Self-Talk:

1. "I deserve to be treated this way."
2. "There's nothing I can do about it."
3. "If I speak up, they'll be more angry."

COLD Behavior:

1. Do or say nothing.
2. Mutter or speak with low vol volume.
3. Сгу.
4. Meek "I did something wrong victim attitude.
5. Avoid the angry person

Drawbacks of the COLD (Passive) Response

Drawbacks of passive responses to anger include more angry behavior from the person, failure to resolve interpersonal conflicts, and negative thoughts about self. Additionally, feelings of anger, frustration, or sadness may increase. Temporary relief may be experienced through withdrawal from the immediate situation when anger occurs. This is an illusory benefit as it is actually counterproductive to any long-term solution.