Introduction
Learning to recognize, accept and control one's own anger is a complex process. Frustration over acquiring new skills and broken agreements are some common triggers for experiencing anger from within. When feeling angry, dealing with it appropriately is a difficult, challenging task. If not handled effectively, angry behavior can cause emotional and physical damage to those it is directed against, and embarrassment and guilt to the individual "acting it out." Angry actions can elicit extreme reactions from others, ranging from social withdrawal to aggression. Learning to direct one's anger can be useful in finding solutions to difficult interpersonal problems. The following program demonstrates methods that children and young adults can use to effectively cope with their own anger.
Anger/Other vs. Anger/Self
The focus of Module 4 (Coping With Anger From Others) is on responding to the other person's anger. He/She is angry with us and we must reply. Initially, we are not angry ourselves, the anger is introduced from the outside. In these situations, anger confronts us. As illustrated by the characters in the videos, there are three basic ways we can react: COLD, HOT, and COOL.
Module 5 (Coping With One's Own Anger) addresses self-anger. We are angry, we do the confronting, and we introduce our anger into the situation. We can direct our angry feelings at the other person(s) by being COLD, HOT or COOL. As we continue to see, the COOL, assertive mode is the most successful in resolving conflict.
Anger from Self-Module Objectives
This program will teach students to:
- Understand what angry behavior is.
- Understand why you become angry.
- Identify personal, physical responses to anger.
- Learn to accept angry feelings as fair and recognize the need to express them appropriately.
- Identify characteristics of:
- A COLD (giving up) response to your own anger.
- A HOT (blowing up) response to your own anger.
- Learn to think about the choices and think about what happens with HOT and COLD responses to your own anger.
- Identify the three steps of the COOL response to anger:
- LOOK COOL: Calm Down/Relax/Breathe
- THINK COOL: Self-Talk
- ACT COOL: Take Confident Action for:
- FRUSTRATION, using 4-Step Plan - Lesson 2
- BROKEN PROMISES, using 4-Step Plan - Lesson 3
- Recall and perform the steps of being in control/COOL responses to angry feelings in roleplay and real situations.